I’ll take this opportunity to share a little bit about me: Who am I? What’s my story? What brought me to creating BODY // MIND // FLOW?
I ALMOST ENDED IT ALL.
It was early March 2014, and I had just had yet another heated exchange with my business partner. Having left the studio to walk it off, I found myself on the terrace at Somerset House, staring down at the murky winter waters of the Thames. I was thinking about jumping and ending it.
Anyone looking at me from the outside would have seen a blond, ‘strapping, tall-drink-of-water’ man of 6’6” who ‘had it all’ – sporting accolades, fitness, success in business, property, and a shiny, impressive life that many people would consider a blessing.
Just a few days before, I had landed at Heathrow, having spent a month in LA working (and of course partying) with private clients. I dashed from my 5PM flight arrival into a car that would drive me and a bag filled with precious jewellery back to my studio, to leave at 3AM the following morning for the first flight to depart for Zurich.
That ring HAD to arrive in time, no questions. International couriers wouldn’t guarantee the timely arrival of this bespoke ring that had had a last minute issue with one of our craftsmen. The clients (two of our favourites) were nestled in a suitably remote and chic Swiss ski resort for their engagement. So cue one flight, three trains and a driver to make it happen in time.
This iconic ring secured its own feature in the New York Times shortly after that engagement, joining the other enviable press clippings that we secured as a brand. It was a perfect blend of jet planes, celebrities, fashion weeks and fabulousness…wasn’t it?
In reality, my struggle was with all the ‘succeeding’ that I had set up for myself. I owned multiple businesses, was living this jet-set life, and if all that weren’t enough, I was overtrained from racing international Ironman and leading fitness classes in London.
I was disintegrating. I was burnt out. Frankly I was pissed off, generally. I thought that this successful person was WHO and HOW I needed to be in order for people to like me. But I didn’t even like myself, to the point where the word love made me heave. An active usage of various intoxicants allowed me to cover up my in-the-toilet levels of confidence.
So here I was standing on this terrace over the Thames, contemplating ending it all…
It was at that moment that I heard an inner voice. It pulled me back and told me to turn around and find another way. Right then I knew I had to find the change, somehow.
Maybe I needed to try something different…something new? I badly wanted to quell the exhaustion of the trap that had become my life. Enough had to be enough. I craved clarity. I yearned for truth.
It would take several more years and several more disputes to extricate myself from the business and life I’d spent so much love and time building, but it had to be done.
IT WAS AN INSIDE JOB.
Enough of burnt relationships. Enough of burning myself out. Enough of not knowing. Enough of not being enough.
So what to do?
I ran away. Far. And kept going.
I got on a plane to India. To find myself.
That’ll sort it out, right?
Was THIS it?
The thing that would ‘fix’ me?
I’d read so many stories about people finding their lost selves in India, this may well have been it…
I started with the Dalai Lama, and the plan was to work from there.
What didn’t make it into my backpack was either rented, sold, or packed away. So here it was, THE trip to reinvigorate, reinvent, renew and re-strategise my life. I wanted to integrate my disintegrated self. I wanted to find a more grounded, connected way of living.
Did I find everything I needed in India?
I immersed myself in Eastern philosophies: becoming a yoga teacher; reiki practitioner; studied Ayurvedic medicine; and topped it off with Buddhism.
Maybe you’ve been down a similar road, in pursuit of trying to make it all work?
Reading this back it sounds so cliche. But this was the jump-point for the long road to finding true love – of myself. It was this first trip of many more that showed me, for the first time in my life, that I —and only I— had the power to change my life.
From this opportunity to restart, there was much work to be done on the inside. So, I up-skilled, learning the techniques that would allow me to do this inner ‘work’. I moved to Australia to study Developmental Coaching, Integral Theory, NLP, Meta Coaching Neuro Semantics and also sit in self-inquiry.
I learnt how to edit what wasn’t working, curate what was, and start to build a life based on solid, healthy and sustainable foundations.
I build a framework for my own transformation, which evolved around three core tenets – BODY, MIND + FLOW. These were the areas that I originally struggled with, that later gave me focus and clarity.
In finding my process and framework, I also discovered my purpose on this planet:
To guide others in deep, transformational inner work that unleashes great potential.
The mode of conversation and chronology of practices I offer have all been lived experience for me. They have the power to facilitate my clients out of suffering and into a more easeful life, evolving into a more sustainable way of living it.
The work continues for it is a life-long commitment to live in and with truth…to be in harmony with reality. As they say (whoever they are), I talk my talk but I walk it too.
The journey is from survival mode, to thriving.
The only way is to turn inward.
So in service of others, this is what I do: One conversation at a time, my clients unravel their thoughts and feelings in a constructive, positive way, learning how to be their own best friends.
The ultimate potential for all of us is to realise our own power in the world.
SO, WHO AM I?
I’m just a guy who’s doing the work of clearing himself, so that he may in some way be able to contribute to a world that is based on equality, equity and joy.
If you’re interested to find out more about what is possible for you, I invite you to sign up to my newsletter. You’ll receive notes on love, tools for knowing and reflections on flow. You’ll also gain complimentary access to ELEMENTS of YOGA – an online learning resource for the practice that has been my bedrock throughout my wobbliest moments.
At some stage or another, perhaps I’ll be given the pleasure of meeting you in one of the courses I facilitate, or in person at one of my ‘PLAYshops’.
With love,
X Nathan
PS. You can sign up HERE.